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identity
You seek out people who confirm your negative traits.
A 1983 study showed that people preferred feedback that aligned with their existing self-conception.
Self-verification theory suggests that we want others to see us as we see ourselves, even if that view is negative. We find consistency comfortable, and feedback that contradicts our self-image creates cognitive friction. We prioritize the stability of our identity over the accuracy of the feedback.
We sometimes prefer being 'right' about our flaws to being wrong about our strengths.
Where this comes from
- Study
- William Swann, 1983, Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
- What the check found
- The 1983 JPSP paper by William B. Swann, Jr. ('Self-verification: Bringing social reality into harmony with the self') correctly established the core findings of self-verification theory.
- Confidence
- Solid, with limits
Related
One of these every day, and every one names the study it came from. When a finding is contested, it says so.